Love one another; as I have loved you. – John 13:34 –
Christians, you also are to love one another not because of the gain that you get from one another but because of the good you can do for one another. I once heard a minister grumble about the Baptist denomination. He said, “I do not know what the denomination ever did for me.” I could not help thinking to myself, “Well, now, that is a question that has never occurred to me and probably never will. The question that has occurred to me is ‘What can I do for the denomination?’” And I think this is the kind of question that every Christian minister should ask, not only concerning his denomination but also concerning Christians in general. We should not ask “What can these people do for me?” No, put the shoe on the other foot and say “What can I do for these people?”
If you want to love someone, you must not try to get him to do a kindness for you. No, you must do a kindness for him, and then you will love him. You cannot do good for another person without discovering in your heart a growing concern for him. It is possible that a child may forget her mother, forget that she drew her life, nourishment, and all the comforts of her infancy from her mother. The mother, though, does not forget that she reared her child in her weakness and raised her to strength. If you want to love a person, then do something loving for that person, and then love will spring up in your soul for that person. Our Lord Jesus Christ loved His disciples unselfishly; let us do the same.
From Spurgeon on Unity, pp. 78–79